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The Rob Ford shitstorm is all about class and race and his enemies will not win this phony war

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crack ford

The majority of people calling for Rob Ford’s head are either political opportunists or political ignoraNuses (no, that’s not a typo).

ignoranus

If Ford had been caught smoking weed, he’d be freestyling with Snoop Dogg at the ACC.

snoop

If he’d been caught smoking crystal meth, the script for the first Breaking Bad feature film would be finished,

breaking bad

Ford would be cast in the lead role and millions of the show’s fans would be making ape noises, beating their chests and chanting his name.

fans

Seriously, do you think, for so much as a second, that Ford would be making international headlines if he’d been caught snuffling up a big, fat line of coke?

lines

Even if he were doing it off a stripper’s tits?

coke tits

No.

no

But crack is a ghetto drug. Crack is a drug for poor people. The middle class HATE the poor. Crack is a drug for poor people, and that, boys and girls, is what Ford’s enemies are subtly pushing.

Crack is the ugliest of drugs. Heroin has always been cool with rock stars, and rock stars have always been cool. If Ford had been caught chasing the dragon, his ratings would have gone through the roof. But crack is a drug for poor people. And the middle class HATE the poor.

more

And, let’s face it, crack is a drug for NIGGERS.

crackie

Now, before you shit your pants and have a three valve jammer at the sight of the word NIGGER, tell me something – how do you pronounce the word that pops into your mind when you read, or hear,the term “N-word’? Okay, fine. Rob Ford was smoking crack with N-words. Does that work for you? Do N-words even exist? Ask Chris Rock

By any definition of the word – you know, the N-word – Rob Ford was smoking rock with niggers. If he’d been smoking rock with a bunch of white lawyers and Bay Street brokers, would he be up Shit Creek? Well, probably, but not nearly as far as he is, and he’d have a at least one paddle.

I’d be interested in seeing some polling on Ford’s support, which, so I hear, went up by 5% since the cops got their hands on the video of him rocking it up. I’d like to see a breakdown of those numbers along race and class lines. I’ll bet his numbers have gone up with Trawna blacks and poor folks.

Marion Barry

brry sting

danced this dance a long time ago and anyone who watched it don’t need to see the fat white guy gettin’ down and funky.

fat white guy

No one gave a flying fuck when the Globe and Mail published its expose on the drug dealing history of the Mayor and his brother Doug. Why didn’t anyone give a fuck? Because the Ford brothers were mostly dealing hash, and ain’t no one gives a fuck about anyone smoking hash.

hash

According to the Globe piece, the Ford brothers had a nice little empire going before they decided to go straight. A nice little empire built on the sale of illegal drugs. That’s ORGANIZED CRIME. And no one gives a shit. Hell, most of you had totally forgotten about that scorcher of a GOTCHA!,  if you even heard of it in the first place. Now here’s the kicker – a lot of the hash that makes its way to Trawna comes from Afghanistan. Were the Ford boys doing business, directly or inadvertently, with the Taliban?

stoning

Never mind. It’s a rhetorical question because NO ONE CARES!

do not care

Rob Ford had a motherfucker of a winning streak going for him. That he could climb to the top position in the biggest city in Canada (and I believe the BBC said that Trawna is the 5th largest city in all of North America, since becoming a super city) is nothing short of a miracle. Well, a miracle of sorts.

The cops, who surely knew about  the Ford brothers’ drug dealing, never bothered to leak the story to the press?

keystone cops

The press couldn’t be bothered to do enough background checking to find out Ford was dealing drugs?

stooges

And the fat fuck sat his fat ass down in the Mayor’s throne? Rob and Doug must have been laughing like gas huffing retards through this fairy tale life of theirs.

huffer

Then the big guy fucked up and let someone film him smoking crack with a pack of niggers. Crack is for poor people. The middle class HATE poor people. And no matter how liberal whitey gets, whitey don’t like niggers. Hell, as Chris Rock so eloquently explains it, even black people don’t like niggers. Ain’t no one likes anyone, of any race, profiting off the misery of other people. Except maybe lawyers. And arms merchants. And bankers. And… okay, scrap that point.

Ford’s political enemies have been praying that they can create enough of a tsunami to beach the big whale.

beached whale

They’re hoping no one notices that the case to harpoon Moby Dick

moby

is based on class and race. It’s not working and the dumb fucks can’t figure out why . Here’s why, dumb asses –

clinton

Bill Clinton.

No one really cared how many times Clinton got his dick sucked in the Oval Office, or anywhere else, or who was sucking it, as long as it wasn’t a child or a guy. Why didn’t anyone care? Because it’s none of their fucking business.

All the people who are supposed to be outraged that Rob Ford got caught smoking crack simply don’t care. It’s none of their business.

none

Those people are not as classist or as racist as Ford’s enemies imagined they were. Oh, there are enough of them out there, in Trawna, to make some waves, but if they didn’t care enough about Ford’s drug empire to chase him from City Hall, they’re not going to get him for smoking a rock or two, so long as he gets his shit together, which he will.

“Good citizens” all across Canada will continue to wail and whine about Ford for a while. Most of them don’t have a clue what crimes are being committed by their own civic administrations, nor do they much care.  They may hate the idea that Ford has smoked crack. but they’ll get over it. They may hate him for being a big, fat fuck,

fat ford

but they’ll never admit it. Eventually, they’ll move on to minding someone else’s business and Ford’s enemies will have to pack up this circus sideshow and get back to the hard work of trying to beat the Mayor in the political arena.

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About zilla

i was born with skates on. i have three thumbs. i often wish i was a penguin. but i don't like fish, so maybe not.

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